Monday, April 09, 2007

Rainbow Hands

So in December, our fam went to Branson. We'd been a couple of times, but never in the winter and it was BEAUTIFUL! We had a magical time. With the exception of the rainbow hands.

It was one of those souvenier booths that I usually pass right by ... but this one really caught my eye. You dipped your hand ( or hands if you wanted one of you & someone special) into a vat of wax until the mold formed, and then they painted and decorated it for you. They were really cute, and though a bit overpriced, I thought it was worth it. Not like it's a t-shirt you spill chocolate milk on and then throw away. No... I had visions of it capturing history. I asked Julia if she'd do it with me. What a picture for years to come!?!... my precious little girl's hand tucked sweetly in mine capturing the moment she would quickly outgrow....

The process was simple enough... hold hands, then dip them for about 20 seconds in the warm wax, then holding the form dip them into ice water for another 20 seconds... and repeat this about 4 times back and forth until the mold forms. Then slip your hands out, and they paint and decorate it right before your eyes.

Julia was on board. At first. Then she got scared. Then she started crying and didn't want to do it. I talk her into it, step forward,only to hear the owner tell me he really didn't let kids as little as her do it because they usually weren't still enough. Then she starts crying because he won't let her do it. Another customer steps forward and we move off to the side... Jason wants to forget it and walk away, I really want to do it, and Julia is still crying - now because she wants to do it yet is still scared, and mad.

When the other customer is done, and no one is around, I ask the owner if he would just try for us. He agrees, and Julia reluctantly steps up, Jason rolls his eyes, and I try and talk excitedly about this fun thing that were are about to do together!

So we put Julia up on this little stool so she's high enough to dip her hands into the two barrels, and get started. We start with the ice water so the wax only feels warm. Now understand... neither sensation is really extreme or uncomfortable... just funny feeling as you went from one to the other. But as we start... Julia decides that she doesn't want to do it any more... and starts pulling away and crying. I however, have determined that we have made enough of a scene that we are not turning back. So I grip her hand to hold it in form, she cries ( loudly) and I smile and offer encouraging words as I fake appearing completely oblivious to the whole thing.

When we finally complete the process and remove our hands... there it is: that sweet beautiful, history capturing moment of me death gripping Julia's hand.


Somehow, it seemed the appropriate moment to catch in a permanent mold.

That little mold sits on her bookcase in her room, now. This morning she randomly pops up and says, "Momma, some things I want to stay with me forever."

"Like what?" I ask. "My Rainbow Hands." She answered.

She takes them down and often shows anyone who visits. I catch her playing with it every now and then. (Even when she's not supposed to.) She loves it.

Isn't that ironically true of some of our more traumatic moments in life?
If we let them, they become the moments that redefine us. God gently walks us forth,despite the fact that our heels are dug in and our protests loud.Our fear becomes so overwhelming and our cries so adamant that we become oblivious to the comfort of His presence beside us and His hand holding ours, experiencing everything we are desperate to get away from right along with us. And then it's over. And as tears clear and time passes, one day that moment which we had feared becomes the moment we value. Sometimes we even treasure it. It some small way, it is a humble symbol of what we learned that we could survive -when we learned that He really did create us differently than we had always seen ourselves.... When we realized that the death grip showed that He was bigger than what we were afraid of ..

Those rainbow hands were worth the price... and ended up capturing way more than just a moment for us...

5 comments:

Heather Winter said...

Beautiful.

flee said...

Thank you Heather. And thank you God!

Terry Rush said...

I like the story; especially the part where Jason is rolling his eyes, walking away, and rolling his eyes some more.

Shouldn't you have gotten his eyes waxed? Wouldn't that be a precious keepsake?

I love you today!

Jill said...

Great story and awesome analogy, Heather!! You are such a talented writer!

Cindy said...

What a beautiful post!
Thank you